Avoiding the Traps of the Professional Negotiator: Four Recommendations

  1. Keep your cool. Do not allow yourself to be overcome by either enthusiasm or anger. Remain an observer as well as a participant in the negotiations.
  2. Show empathy. Before and throughout the discussions, ask yourself what you would do if you were in the other party’s shoes. What would be your objectives? How could you achieve them? Judging the other party serves no purpose. Trying to understand him is more useful.
  3. Talk little, listen a lot. Everything that you say may be noted and used against you, particularly if it involves information about your internal constraints, your price or cost structure, your processes, your alternatives, and so on.
  4. Be patient—and show it. Do not be in too much of a rush to complete the deal. Even when you are nearing the finishing line, be prepared to start again from scratch if the situation so requires. Do not make any major decision without taking the time to reflect and consult.

Key Points to Memorize

• If you encounter attempts to undermine you, remain courteous but ask for better negotiating conditions.

• When your counterpart makes a threat, assess the risks and avoid an emotional response.

• If you face claims of great urgency, negotiate a deadline.

• If ambushed by the “Columbo effect,” stand firm.

• When faced with two people using the “good cop/bad cop” routine, focus your attention and vigilance on the “good cop,” who is generally the real negotiator.

• Never view a “budgetary limit” as fixed without verifying the true position.

Some Sensible Questions to Ask Yourself

• Which of these traps have I already encountered in my work?

• In which situations am I most vulnerable?

• What instincts must I acquire in order to deal with these situations?

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