I’ve spent years watching successful people, and I don’t just mean successful as in having lots of money or a big-shot career. In fact one of the most successful people I ever met lived incredibly frugally and simply and reclusively and yet had cracked it in a really big way – happiness, peace, contentment. This was a person you couldn’t have wiped the inner smile off even if you had tried.

Almost all successful people have a sense of their own dignity. Now what do I mean by this? Well, they are all pretty solid in themselves; they have worked out who they are and what they are about. They don’t need to show off, brag about what they have, or who they are. They don’t need to draw attention to themselves because they aren’t particularly interested in what we think – they are too busy getting on with things in their own lives. They maintain decorum (lovely old-fashioned word that) not because they are frightened of making a fool of themselves or falling flat on their face but because they simply can’t be bothered with attention-seeking stuff.

It is important – if you want to be a successful Rules Player – to show poise, gravitas, be a bit separate from the herd, have good manners, be polite and considerate and to be someone others might like to look up to. You don’t have to be all aloof and stand-offish, serious and grown-up. You can still have fun – just don’t go making a prat of yourself. You can still let your hair down – just don’t let go of control completely. You can still relax – just don’t fall off the edge.

Dignity is about showing self-respect and having quiet self-esteem. It’s amazing how others will respect you and hold you in greater esteem when you start the ball rolling.