If you imagine yourself as the centre of your own universe, then you are the very hub. The next circle around you is your lover, your partner; this is your closest, most intimate relationship. The next circle to that is your family and friends. These are the people you love the most, choose to spend most time with, love you the most. These are the people you can relax with, kick off your shoes and be yourself. But there are still Rules. There is still a right way to treat them and a not-so-right way. You still have to behave with honour, dignity, respect. You have responsibilities towards both your children and your parents. You have a duty to your siblings. You have obligations, which have to be taken seriously, to your friends.

You have a whole raft of hats to wear – parent, friend, child, brother/sister, uncle/aunt, godparent, niece/nephew, cousin – and a whole set of Rules and duties to perform. The next section is guidance on how best to wear all these hats.

As we go through this life we have to interact with other people. We rub up against them (emotionally) all the time and we have to have Rules to govern our behaviour so we do right by them, to steer us through tricky situations, new experiences and ongoing close relationships.

If we want our relationships with our family and friends to be successful and for them to think the very best of us, then we do need to give those relationships some thought – a conscious approach rather than sailing on asleep at the wheel like most people. By consciously being aware of what we are doing we can improve those relationships, iron out the problems, encourage others and generally spread a bit of warmth and happiness as we go. What could be finer?