I know a woman with greyhounds (see Rule 55). When she comes home her dogs are always pleased to see her, but then dogs always are. No matter how badly you have treated them^* they always go nuts. Of course, you want your partner to behave in just the same fashion, to go nuts when you come home. And I’m sure they do, don’t they? And of course you do when they come home, don’t you? No? Why not? Yes? Well done.

We all need someone who is pleased to see us. It makes us feel it is all worthwhile. I love it when I have to go away for work for a day or two and then when I get back my children all stand there, like children do, with their hands outstretched with that lovely, ‘Have you brought me something back?’ look on their faces.

Or when they get back from school and you ask if they’ve had a good day and they grunt at you. So refreshing. But you are still incredibly pleased to see them – for them you are their someone or something.

And no, the red light of the TV standby button isn’t enough. You do need a person or a pet. One of my sons claims his gecko is always pleased to see him but I have tried hard to detect any emotion on its face and so far failed – the gecko’s not my son’s.

Having someone or something who is pleased to see you is important because it gives you someone who needs you and this gives you a purpose, stops you getting self-absorbed, gives you a reason for getting on with life. But what if you live alone and don’t have pets or children? Well, voluntary or charity work is a very good way to quickly get in the situation where somebody is pleased to see you. Then again, it could be right on your doorstep.

Even living alone in a part of London where nobody really talked to their neighbours, a friend of mine discovered there was a retired disabled man who lived a few doors down from her. She noticed that he found excuses to ‘just happen to be at his door’ as she walked past on her way back from work most days. He was clearly a bit lonely and really valued a quick chat (or a longer one if possible). He was pleased to see her. Who is pleased to see you?