79.

Get Out of Your Head

Thinking is overrated. That may seem like an odd idea coming from someone who holds a doctorate, but we human beings do have a tendency to overthink things—particularly when we're alone. It's as if you have a tape in your head that keeps looping back, repeating the same conversation over and over again.

What's happening is that your fear and anxiety are becoming amplified. Ever notice how the conversation on that tape is usually a negative one? It never seems to be about how wonderful you are. Its subject matter is invariably about something you're lacking. When you're looking for work, your mind is probably telling you things like, “You're not good enough,” “You're too old,” “You're too young,” “You don't have enough education,” “You're overqualified,” “You're under-qualified,” “No one cares,” “The job market is tough,” “You shouldn't have left that last job,” “What about the gap in your résumé,” “You're terrible at interviewing,” blah, blah, blah....

That's called “a conversation not worth having.” Whether those things are true or not, they don't empower you in any way. They just make you a little crazy. If you're alone—and when you're looking for work, you often are—that negative voice gets louder. Try to step back for a moment and realize that these conversations are merely interpretations born out of isolation. And if you can't step back, at least take some steps to muffle the negativity to manage your fear and anxiety. You may be bearing down too hard when what you need is to distract yourself. Give yourself permission to do that.