My Aunty Ethel is brilliant. She always remembers birthdays, phones my Mum when she sees me in the newspapers, calls the kids if they have achieved something, buys brilliant presents for Christmas and birthdays and is the perfect hostess if you visit.

I wonder what she would say about her nephew, Michael. Probably that I never remember her birthday, hardly ever call, I am usually too busy to visit and in many ways could be a lot better. But that’s the beauty of an Aunty Ethel; she’s so forgiving.

Losing the connection

When we are younger these relatives are quite special; because they are ‘one step removed’ from close family they are an easier group to get on with. As an uncle myself I appreciate my relationship with my nephew and niece as being based on all the fun but with none of the responsibility. Nice.

As we get older, our relationship with our aunts and uncles tends to be much more distant and, for many of us, non-existent. This is a great shame as it is likely there’s no great underlying cause – it’s simply a case of keeping the connection going.

The family tree

As with all family relationships, you’ve got to think about staying in touch, showing an interest and being proactive.

All of these apply with the aunts’ and uncles’ area too but there is another magic tool you can use with them as well. It’s called the family tree. Have you ever thought about your genealogy? Once you get past great grandparents there tends to be a breakdown in the family records, but now, with the use of technology and the accessibility of records, it’s never been easier to study your earlier generations. I bet if you were to go back just five generations you’d find some amazing information that could be shared.

Or finally, why not ask them for their knowledge to help you get started with the project?

Do all of this and you’ll be giving yourself much higher marks in the future.