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POSITIVE ATTITUDE

You must have heard it a million times. It’s probably one of the key phrases associated with personal development: ‘positive thinking’. But what does it mean?

When Napoleon Hill, who is credited as one of the main founders of the modern personal development movement, wrote Think and Grow Rich, he repeatedly used an expression that has stuck with me (and I’m sure with many others). He said, ‘Thoughts are things.’ The implication of this is that anything we have, or do, started with a thought. If that’s the case, wouldn’t it make sense that if you wanted to have positive things happen you should have positive thoughts?

Being negative is easier than being positive

Looking at the negative takes less creativity than looking for a positive. Having a moan is easier than being upbeat. Complaining seems more natural than complimenting. So, if you want to be different it will take some effort. Are you up for that challenge? I thought so; here’s how.

Upgrade from just ‘positive thinking’ to taking ‘positive action’

If you wanted to become a fitter person and you spent an hour each day thinking about it, how much fitter would you expect to become? Well, amazingly, some research suggests even by thinking about taking exercise you can become fitter (but only slightly). What if you spent that same hour going out for a walk, jogging, cycling, swimming or in the gym? I’m sure you’ll agree your fitness levels would soar!

It’s the actions that make the difference. Once I realised this I began to study actions and more specifically which positive actions would have the biggest effects. And I believe I found the answer by studying language and in particular, ‘stimulus responses’. These responses occur at a subconscious level. Just as loud noises make us jump, we automatically use particular patterns of words to respond without thinking about what we say.

Choose your words carefully

I believe the foundation to changing your levels of positivity is your language. With over a million words to choose from in the English language and billions of others around the world, there has to be a more positive way to express how you are feeling. Here are some thoughts:

  • ‘I’m sad’ becomes ‘I could feel happier’ or ‘I need to cheer up’.
  • ‘That’s useless’ can be transformed to ‘I think that could work better’.
  • ‘I’m bored’ becomes ‘I need to make this more interesting’.

Take a few minutes to jot down five key negative words or phrases you use and see if you can change the words to express the same feeling, but asking for a positive result.

Here’s the classic . . .:

QUESTION: ‘How are you today?

ANSWER: ‘Not bad’ or ‘Fine

I don’t think many people carefully consider their response to that common question about their well-being. If, as Napoleon Hill suggests, thoughts are things, what sort of day would you have if whenever you are asked how you’re doing you replied: ‘Not bad.’ Do you think that response would encourage your subconscious to create an amazing, creative, fun-filled adventurous day? Probably not. It’s more likely you’d drift through another uneventful day, one pretty much like the last.

What if you changed your response and used a word like ‘Brilliant!’ Think about it. If you’ve been a ‘not bad’ person for years and you suddenly shock your brain by saying you’re ‘brilliant’, what kind of subconscious actions are going to take place to fulfil this new belief about yourself? Brilliant ones!

I’ve been teaching people this simple method for change for over 15 years and the results are amazing. First, you feel better. Second, the person who asked you feels better. Third, it only takes 30 days for a ‘brilliant’ response to become a habit and then you’ll always feel better.

OK, it doesn’t need to be ‘brilliant’; you may decide to have a different positive stimulus response for each day of the week:

Marvellous – Monday

Terrific – Tuesday

Wonderful – Wednesday

Tremendous – Thursday

Fabulous – Friday

Stunning – Saturday

Splendid – Sunday

Here’s a challenge for you – test this one idea for the rest of today and measure the results.

Make a positive choice

The ability to choose how we feel or react to a situation is one of the most amazing gifts we have as humans. Most other animals can only respond – we can reason. The tragedy is, too often we don’t.

My favourite movie is The Castle. It’s an Australian comedy about a family who face the threat of a compulsory purchase of their home (their castle) because the authorities are planning to extend the local airport.

The opening scene features a monologue by the youngest son, Dale, as he describes the family home and each member of the family. If there was ever a brilliant example of positive choice, it’s in this young man’s description of their life. Most people would think that living bang next to an airport would be a pretty horrendous experience, but Dale’s view is that it’s just very convenient, should they ever need to fly somewhere – one day.

You may argue that the family are incredibly naïve; sorry, could be brighter. But the fact is they choose to see the positive in every situation. What better choices could you make?

Practise making these simple choices every day until they become part of a new and more positive you.

Making better choices

If you are caught up in traffic, could you see that as an opportunity to practise some breathing exercises? It’s healthier; you can’t control the traffic but can help yourself to live longer.

When it rains, do you choose to think about the green and pleasant land we live in or are you upset about the temporary inconvenience?

If something doesn’t go your way, could it be that there’s something bigger and better for you around the corner?

When something goes wrong, do you beat your chest and pull out your hair or take a step back and think: ‘Now, what have I learned?’

BRILL BIT

Start to be positive with the weather. You can’t control it, so, no matter what it does, look for the positives. Rain, wind, sun and snow, you name it. Find a reason to be thrilled and make the most of it.

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