156
LOSS
YOUR ARMS HAVE
BEEN SEVERED
You wake from an anesthetic and remember
why you’re in a hospital bed. Your arms have
been cut o. The horror increases when you
realize it’s not even possible to feel where and
how: you have no hands to search, and the
feeling of powerlessness is overwhelming. You
scream out, but no one answers.
Action Consider the reason for such a
harrowing dream. It’s likely to be based on
recent events, where you felt either unable to
lash out verbally or blamed yourself for having
such powerful physical feelings against
someone. Your psyche played out the damage
for you. Now you must contemplate how better
to resolve the problem. If talking doesn’t work,
try piling up cushions and punching them—
in the privacy of your bedroom.
MISSING
BODY PARTS
The idea of losing any part of our body
holds primitive fear: at a base level, we
believe a missing limb—or whatever
part it may be—means we are less able
to survive. Of course, we can and we
do, but the loss usually represents a
sense of powerlessness.
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157
Missing Body Parts
YOUR TEETH ARE
FALLING OUT
As you brush your teeth, you watch horried as
some of them clatter into the sink. You pick
them up and try to glue them back into your
gums, but they fall out again and again.
Action Ask yourself what’s going on that feels
dicult to chew on or bite through. If a major
decision is the issue, you may need to reect
carefully on the best options. If there’s
potentially a high cost at risk—emotionally or
nancially—this may have presented your
unconscious with a warning. Write down all of
the pros and cons and see if deliberating rmly
on them will help steer you away from biting
o more than you can chew.
YOU CUT OFF YOUR HAIR
Staying overnight with a group of strangers
where everyone shares dormitory rooms, you
notice one person takes o a wig to reveal a
bald head. Devastated at this shocking hair loss,
you pick up some scissors and cut o chunks of
your own hair to show your sympathy.
Action You have empathy for others, as this
dream shows. But there’s more: you are also
the bald person, taking o a wig to sleep. Are
you afraid of losing your hair—if not fully,
maybe with a daring new style—and you fear
others’ reactions? The scissors gesture
appeared kind, but it gave an equivocal
message. As the bald person, would
witnessing it really have helped your own
situation? Consider the lesson here.
CASE STUDY: CAMERON
Cameron had been a rugby player and keen
golfer. One day, out of the blue, he suered a
serious stroke and lost the use of his right
arm. Walking was dicult, as his right leg was
aected, too, but he managed to work toward
some kind of rehabilitation.
The loss of the use in his right arm aected
him deeply. He could no longer write, drive a
car, or play golf—and consequently lost most
of his old social contacts. As a result, he sank
into depression.
He then had a dream. He was shown a
review of his long life—brave war pilot, father
to ve loving children from two long
marriages (he’d been widowed in midlife), and
busy school teacher. But in the dream, he was
paralyzed! “Watching” his autobiographical
narrative, he was aware that he was unable to
move, experiencing the full horror of total
immobility. When he woke, Cameron realized
he’d lost nothing but the use of his arm,
compared to what might have been. The
dream helped him reappraise his situation
and eased him into acceptance.
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